The Church, and idiocy

Kang: Abortions for all!
Crowd boos.
Kang: Very well… no abortions for anyone!
Crowd boos.
Kang: Hmm… abortions for some, miniature American flags for others!
Crowd cheers
- Treehouse of Horror VII

Yeah, going there again. I really don’t understand the thought process that goes into a lot of the decisions the Catholic Church makes. It’s like they decide what the logical course of action would be, and then go in the opposite direction. Seriously, how do things like this keep happening?

First, there’s a pretty sad case coming from Brazil. A nine year old girl was raped by her stepfather, became pregnant with twins, and had an abortion. Abortion is illegal in Brazil except in cases like rape or when the mother’s life is in danger. Both of these exceptions are present in this case. Any guesses who the Church excommunicated?

Most people, I imagine, would guess that the rapist step-father was the one kicked out of the Church. However, as Rome has reiterated many times over the last couple decades, raping children really isn’t that big a deal. The stepfather gets to stay in the Church, and, if he takes Holy Orders, may end up presiding over an Arch Diocese somewhere.

No, rather than side with logic and compassion, the Church instead decided to excommunicate the doctors who performed the operation, and the girl’s mother. What the fuck? Does anyone think that this is a good idea? Brazil is one of the most fiercely anti-abortion countries in the world, but even most Brazilians are appalled by the Church’s actions here. Nothing about the Church’s decision makes sense.

Seriously, can’t we just calm down about abortion. It’s a legitimate medical procedure, and if you think it’s wrong you don’t have to get one. Over two hundred thousand woman are treated in Brazilian hospitals for problems spawned by illegal abortions every year. I doubt that anyone has any idea how many illegal abortions go unreported. This is obscenely dangerous; when one out of every three pregnancies is unwanted, people are going to be having abortions. It’s the government’s responsibility to offer a safer alternative to a wire hanger in a Sao Paolo alley.

Barack Obama is also catching shit from the Catholic Church, this time over his decision to fund stem cell research. The Church says he’s just doing this to help drug companies, because I guess there’s no way that being able to regenerate cells would help anyone ever. The Church says that Obama is choosing politics over ethics, which I guess is one way to look at this, albeit a retarded way. I feel like this is something that the Church is going to apologize for opposing in like six hundred years, after some hellbound scientists have cured Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, and most spinal cord injuries.

I’m going to give Jon the last word on this Church stuff:

"I'm tired of all this from-down-on-high bull, I don't really understand the people who get to make these rules up. It doesn't make any sense that they should be able to decide the fate of someone's soul, based on an interpretation of a translation of a translation of a collection of passages from a series of possibly unrelated documents passed down through generations that were supposedly written via the influence of an invisible spirit. Honestly, I think Church doctrine has been interpreted more often and far more loosely than our own Constitution, and the conservatives all applaud their 'hard lines' on dogma when it's pretty plain that it’s being manipulated for the hierarchy's benefit."