LoMo Hemingway

The fact that people care about this enough to prompt an AP article is astounding and depressing.

Logan Morrison a hit on Twitter

Good Lord.

MIAMI -- Logan Morrison tweets to the amusement of thousands and the dismay of his team's top executive.

The 23-year-old left fielder known as "LoMo" may lead the league in Twitter wisecracks.

He does, it's true. Logan Morrison has an astounding TWA of .455, good enough for a 30-point lead over second place Twitterer Hunter Pence. But once you adjust for the low attendance and thereby quick cell reception at Marlins games, LoMo's xTWA is a dismal +89.

Morrison engages in exchanges with his Twitter followers, unlike celebrity athletes who limit their tweeting to status reports on dinner plans and such.

This was written by ESPN.com news services. To ESPN, this is news.

What's more, we first hear about whether or not LoMo uses asterisks in the middle of naughty, grown-up words (sometimes he DOESN'T!) before we hear about the fact that he also uses Twitter to raise money for the American Lung Association in memory of his late father who died of lung cancer. Priorities.